The hidden years in Canada 35, Suzanne

Door San-Daniel gepubliceerd op Thursday 09 April 18:15



‘Right men,’ said Pop, ‘you could find the way back?’ ‘We always can,’ I replied, ‘there's only one pop.’ ‘What can I do for the gentlemen,’ he laughed. ‘I myself am quite hungry,’ I said, ‘Bev and Don are coming, but we could do with a good breakfast.’ ‘In the evening,’ chuckled the old man, ‘have you been out boys?’ ‘A late party,’ Rico said. So we had just finished our late breakfast and were innocently  behind some coffee when Don and Bev entered. Richard had just thrown a quarter into the juxebox and Rainy day women filled the room. ‘Boy,’ I, ‘laughed that Dylan was so high as a frog. Listen, how he sings, it is not played, it is how  he feels it. ‘

Pop wiped his hands on his apron and came to the table, ‘fair lady,’ he asked Beverly, ‘peasants,’ he nodded at us, ‘what can I do for you?’ ‘Don,’ said, ‘I should like a milkshake’ and Richard said, ‘Don, you've come out of the closet,  now have you, my fair lady’ ‘Ah, said Bev cross dressing is quite common nowadays. I wear jeans anyway. ‘ ‘Do you ever dress up as a woman,’ Richard asked our puzzled Don? ‘Absolutely not’, said Don, ‘I must not think about it, my stomach would turn over.’ ‘Please puke to the left,’ Richard advised, ‘I am to the right of you.’ ‘Me thinks the lady doth protest too much ..’ I said. ‘Am I a lady,’ said Don outraged. ‘It's a quote from Hamlet, if you protest too much or deny too much then you probably have something to hide.’ ‘We all hide a bit, now and then,' said Don. ‘I am a cross dresser,’ reported Pop and when we looked at him bewildered, he pointed at his apron. ‘Do everyone a milkshake,’ said Bev and with that the greeting was behind us as if we had never been apart.


‘What have you been up to?’ I asked. ‘Learning,’ said Bev 'and then some more learning, we are almost there, just a few months. ‘ ‘I’ll start within two weeks,’ Richard said, ‘I'm getting really tired of the  ’real‘ life.’ ‘Hey,’ said Don, ‘it's almost Stampede time, we all have to go, it might be the last time that we’ll be together in this city.’ ‘For me, it is,’ I replied. ‘July,’ said Don, ‘I’ll write it down.’ ‘You need to write that down,’ laughed Richard? ‘Man Don, you can not possibly have so many appointments that you do not know who you're going to the Stampede with?’ ‘I have a little red book for my appointments, said Don ... ' ' and there is now one appointment in it’ Richard broke in, ours. ‘Wow, hopefully you will not lose it, because we would be lost without your red book, the social life would fall to pieces.’

‘Cut it out,’ ‘Bev said,’ it sounds like a good plan, Don, and I think it's a nice ending before we al fan out. ‘ ‘Look,’ said Don, and he pointed at the screen. The Apolo10 started it’s descend. ‘They are not going to land, said Don, it is a 'dry run', an exercise.’ ‘Oh,’ Bev said, not very interested. ‘On purpose they have done too little solid fuel in the tanks of the lunar module, so that the astronauts remain obedient.’ ‘I cannot follow that,’ I said, ‘you express yourself very unfortunately.’ ‘Nasa has as a precaution done just enough fuel in the tank for the exercise but not enough to land and take off again.’ ‘Why would Nasa do that,’ said Bev. ‘Because it would be very tempting,’ Don, ‘laughed for  the lunar module not to touch the ground and be the first man landed. All hell would break loose but the astronauts would have been the first man on the moon and would be heroes on return. ‘ 


‘To strengthen the discipline that precaution was taken. The next flight only, carries out the moon landing. Which is around Stampede time with the Apollo 11.‘ ‘Gosh’, I said, ‘it must indeed be tempting, you fly and bridge that vast distance, you come into a lunar orbit and unplug the lunar module, which allows you to hover above the lunar surface and you rise again and reunite again with the mother ship. I understand that precaution. The discipline falls away beneath that overwhelming moment. ‘

Beverly threw a coin in the slot of the selector that was attached to the juxebox and Suzanne came a little later floating into our room mumbled by the singer and poet Leonard Cohen. ‘I think this is so beautiful.’ she said, ‘you understand that?’ ‘Yes,’ I said, 'He is a poet and not a singer but it's what he sings, while he is speaking, it is a melodious meter. ‘ ‘You know,’ she said, ‘I'm Suzanne, he sings my soul’ ‘I've always known that,’ I replied. ‘Do you understand what it is about,’ she asked? I nodded. ‘Really,’ she asked? ‘Yes,’ I said, ‘really!’ ‘I know,’ she said. ‘Therefore,’ she said, ‘I do not choose for you, we are already the same. Richard is so different that for years he will have no peace in his life. ‘ 'Yup?' I wondered where it would lead to ‘I do not get it,’ said Don. 'What is it about? Therefore, I am going to explain to you your life, ‘said Beverly. She pressed the repeat and Suzanne started again.

'Note Don, I said, and I'll tell you what, sometimes need to be explained by others, not because you do not understand something   but because you are directed otherwise.


Suzanne takes you down to her place near the river

You can hear the boats go by

You can spend the night beside her

And you know that she's half crazy


‘You know, Don, think Bev instead of Suzanne. She took us to the river of  life. That really happened with that big tube and she was beside us. We have really been in that river, the Bow river and it has really opened us up,  we dipped into our lives. Me, she has consoled with body and soul when my brother died., And half crazy, yes, she is different from others. She deviates. ‘


And just When You mean to tell her

That you have no love to give her

Then she gets you on her wavelength

And she lets the river answer

That you've always been her lover


'And like Suzanne, Bev wants to tell you something, listen! This is so important,’ he saw that I was dead serious and Pop listened at our table. ‘Just like you, when you think you do not have love to give her, then she lets that river, life, speak for her, which gives the answer. You've always been the only one for her. Life has chosen you for her, you get me man! ‘


And you want to travel with her

And you want to travel blind

And you know that she will trust you

For you've touched her perfect body with your mind.

‘And you go on a journey together in this great life, this quest, you can blindly travel together, because the trust is there, because she understands you  and the best phrase comes now, but that is due to the poetic beauty of Cohen.’

And the sun pours down like honey

On our lady of the harbor

And she shows you where to look

Among the garbage and the flowers


‘Beverly has hitherto been our main port, the welcoming virgin, waiting on the quay, which because  of the sun, with that same honey sweetness covers her and lights her up, to show you where you can find the real beauty, anywhere.’


There are children in the morning

They are leaning out for love

And they will Lean That Way Forever

While Suzanne holds the mirror


‘In the morning we were children, our life starts now, we are looking for love and we reach / lean out and some will do that forever and not find it. But Beverly holds a mirror out for  you Don. Holds up a mirror to you and if you have mirrored and you know what she says, then you are saved forever. You do not need to find or reach out anymore, you are already there. ‘

Beverly smiled at him. ‘You have explained it nicely,’ said Don. ‘I'm only the translator,’ I said, ‘the speaker is sitting next to you.’ It suddenly hit home by Don, he looked aghast and then tears came splashing from his eyes, ‘Oh man,’ he said, ‘I love you Beverly,’ he started crying and shrugging   without shame. ‘You need me the most,’ said Bev and kissed his tears away. ‘Right,’ said Pop, ‘time for a group hug 'and there we were in an old cafeteria all in a circle.


‘We also have something to report, but that can wait, good luck to you both man.’ Yeah,’ said Richard, likewise, even though I still have much to learn, like someone just said.' 'Listen I suggest we drink to it and then we go to Toby's jug, because you can talk quietly to each other, I really have something very special to share and Suzanne, Bev laughed and said, yes? ‘When I hear this later, then I will think of you.’ ‘Later is now,’ said our goddess of wisdom.

San Daniel March 2015

for information  about the books of San Daniel presss  this  link



Reacties (1) 

Voordat je kunt reageren moet je aangemeld zijn. Login of maak een gratis account aan.
Mooie hommage en verhaal aan L. Cohen !