Sexy girls and jokes!

Door Jacobjones gepubliceerd op Thursday 29 May 17:38

In this article you find a mix of jokes and cartoons of beautiful girls and women. Have fun!

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Little John comes downstairs for breakfast. His mother is in the kitchen.

Mother: Have you done your jobs?

John: No

Mother: No jobs, no breakfast.

Little John goes outside and feeds the chickens and gives a chicken a kick. Then he feeds the pigs and gives a pig a kick. At last he goes to milk the cows and gives a cow a kick.

Then he goes back to the kitchen and his mother gives him a bowl of dry oatmeal.

John: Why do I get no bacon and eggs?

Mother: I saw you kick a chicken so you get no eggs this week and I also saw you kick a pig and a cow so you get no meat and no milk this week.

Then his father came in and kicked the cat.

He looks all smiling at his mother and says: “Are you gone tell him?”.

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Let’s play twister!

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In Scotland Walter McMillan lies on his deathbed knowing the end is near.

At his side are sitting his son, his daughter, his wife and his nurse.

Walter: “Son, I want you take the houses in Eaststreet.”

Son: “Ok dad”.

Walter: “And you my little girl, I want you take the flats in Lakeside.”

Daughter: “Ok, dad”.

Walter: “And you my darling, I want you to take the residences Uptown.”

The nurse was completely speechless and when Walter passes away she said “Your husband must have been a hard working man that he acquired so much property”.

Wife: “Properties? He was talking about his newspaper rounds.”

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An older woman was looking in the mirror while her husband was sitting in the chair reading the newspaper.

Woman: I feel terrible today. I look old and unattractive and I feel fat. A compliment of you would do me good, honey.

Man: Your eyes still work fine honey, my compliments!

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A dumb blonde called her boyfriend and said: “I bough a jigsaw puzzle that is so difficult. The pieces don’t fit and I cannot find the edges”

The boyfriend asked: “And what represents the puzzle?”

The blonde replied: “A big red rooster”.

The boyfriend said: “Wait, I’ll be there in a few minutes”.

The boyfriend came home and saw all the pieces on the kitchen table.

He looked at her and said: “Put the cornflakes back in the box and let’s forget about it”.

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To stop smoking is like the first week in a nudist camp.

You don’t know what to do with your hands.

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In the classroom.

Teacher: John, What do you want to be when you grow up?

John: I want to be a millionaire, take the best bitch, buy a Ferrari and an apartment in Monte Carlo and fuck my bitch three times a day.

Teacher: And you Caroline, what do you want to be?

Caroline: I want to be his bitch.

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Reacties (1) 

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haha was wel grappig and funny